Out of the clouds and back down to Earth

Yesterday while driving back from AIF, I was stopped at a light in Rye.  In front of me was a black SUV with plates that said RS FAN, and so I played with guessing what the RS stood for.. then noticed the bottom frame of the plate said STONES.. oh and the top ROLLING.. not so special except the Rolling Stones, "Get off of my Cloud" was playing on WFUV!!!  What were the chances of that happening!?
I was ready to follow them to tell them but didn't.. and it stayed with me. Wow. Synchronicity for sure and wondered about it.  I don't really recall John being a Stones fan although I do know he liked them.
Moving forward to yoga class, one with a lot of grounding involved. During Savasana, I felt a sensation at my left foot. I felt a presence and it felt as if John was caressing my foot.. a very sensual feeling. I felt him there and his love for me. It was a really strong feeling that made me feel good.. great.. loved.
Later, at home on the computer I see a video from a new "friend" on face book.. Susan is a mutual friend which is why I accepted his request.  The video was about being grounded and the research done about putting our feet on the ground. Bare feet helped to reduce inflammation and heal the body of pain.. point being Be GROUNDED!
Unable to sleep, I felt the message of the day to get my head out of the clouds and get grounded, do the Saturn and here I am home.. ready to do just that.
Get to that pile of papers.
Grateful for the messages, my love.
I love you.

Do your Saturn

John's passing has caused me to rediscover who I am and what I want to do. Really, how do I want to bring more joy into my life.. this fleeting life.
I joined an online astrology lecture series.  I love astrology and find it interesting that my last post here had to do with Saturn!!  Saturn is now in Capricorn in my 4th house, the house of my foundation, my home, roots and that house has seen the endings of much of what I hold dear. The selling and destruction of my childhood home and the passing of John, my comfort, and my "home".
I know all things change and it's not like I didn't know it was coming...
What I didn't know was how I was going to feel about it all.
Like the house gone.. an empty hole.. there is an empty hole in my heart that I try to fill.
I fill it with memory. Work. Study. More time in the gallery. More time doing art. Teaching classes.
More time for me. It feels foreign.
I'm so used to doing for others, I lacked the "me" time. Even sleep became a need I couldn't always fill.
So now.. it is time.
I begin a new life.
I begin new projects, new studies, new classes.  I am open to recreate myself, my environment as well. Redoing the apartment, the gallery and finding how to restructure myself to "do my Saturn".. those things I don't like doing.. taxes in particular and the paperwork that goes along those same veins.
And so my new journey begins...

Saturn's return

As I was writing this morning, it dawned on my how some recent events have been something that have come around.. more like a spiral, but here it is again.
Saturn return most likely has something to do with it.
Saturn returns to it's birthpoint about 29 years and it most likely is around that time that I was teaching a young child art in her home. We made all sorts of things, dolls, painting, etc. and now today I will be teaching her daughters.
Yesterday, I bought 2 boxes of beads and findings from someone and about 29 years ago, I bought all of Rye Art's beads and findings. Ha.. wonder what else the circle of life has to show me with this.
It's life's big mandala.. here I am in the center watching the world go round and round, stopping at interesting places, some which are familiar and some brand new.
All of it exciting though.
This passage, I feel more prepared though, or maybe just more confident, adjusted to life's surprises.
I'm more aware of stuff like this.
More aware of life's messages in the small details of life.
I'm grateful.
I'm more open.
I feel more love.
When we pay attention to these cycles, they can teach us something important.. We've been here before, and now we get a chance to do it again.. maybe this time with more awareness and better prepared and with more love in our hearts.

Virgo rising and what's around the corner.. an opening

VIRGO [Aug 23 - Sep 22]

With your ruler Mercury moving forward again life will feel to have a way of sorting itself out. Everything that was turned upside down can stand right side up which includes certain setbacks in some key connections where some strong and consistent communication became necessary to ensure you were on the same page. What stands out the most this week is the movement of planets into Aries in your house of the Soul. This will deepen your desire to stay true to course which involves making choices that support your natural path. On Monday, March 25, Mars, the planet of desire, will align effortlessly with Jupiter, the planet of prosperity and opportunity in your house of career. A key door is soon to open, one that will lead you further down the yellow brick road.

A breakthrough that brings a rush of excitement and relief is days away!                                                                                           

Virgo as rising sign.. liking this :-)

Putting back the pieces

I haven't blogged in a very long time.  Because of some glitchy stuff with computers, I ended up with too many blogs as well... but I hold on to them anyway.  This blog was about keeping some sort of balance.. between work and play or just with emotions.  How does one maintain the steady peaceful calm when circumstances throw one around... up and down on an emotional roller coaster!
I know we shouldn't let outside circumstance, other people's behavior and all that stuff play us.. but they do. We forget.  We work harder to switch from grumpy, moody, weepy negativity to being ok again.
We are lucky when it happens easily, quickly.. and then there are those times when we just get hammered!
Like lately.. one thing after another and added to it was political tensions around, toilets overflowing, power outages, lose of money from canceled classes, deaths, lack of "free" time and on and on and then the straw.. yup that straw.. broken pottery.
MELT DOWN.
Turn it around.
I learned that Native American weavers purposely put in a flaw into their work.. this is where spirit comes in.
And thus was born the spirit bowl.  Upcycled bowls, a reminder that there is no perfection, that we can see endless possibilities, that we can pick ourselves up and get back on track, rethink the situation.
Today, this spirit bowl sold.  It is filled with gems, a hawk feather and hope.

Balance

I am amazed at how quickly and often I can be thrown off balance. My answer to this recurring observation is to bring my attention back to yoga. Two new books arrived yesterday, bringing my awareness to this lack... and so we begin again.

There is always time to begin again, bring us back to beginner's mind.

It is with everything that needs this attention. Back to my whole way of being.. balancing the time I give to work, which has been over tipping here, with time for art and play. The balance I give between the giving and time for renewal of self.

Is my left balanced with my right.. a question I will continue to ask myself through out the day and weeks ahead.

Namaste'

Completing the circle

BALSAMIC PHASE

The power of the world always works in circles, and everything tries to be round…the sky is round, and…the earth is round like a ball, and so are the stars. The wind, in its greatest power, whirls. Birds make their nests in circles, for theirs is the same religion as ours. The sun comes forth and goes down again in a circle. The moon does the same, and both are round. Even the seasons form a great circle in their changing, and always come back again to where they were. The life of a person is a circle from childhood to childhood, and so it is in everything where power moves.- Black Elk

Winding down with the cycle of the moon. Time to rest. I did so much cleaning and reorganizing and my eyes show proof of it! Puffy, swollen but worth the effort. I smile every time I look into the room.

This will help me to move into a new phase. I've been making more cards and will continue with them until I have enough to present them.

I have the painting to work on as well. Loose ends. Finish up some stuff and then prepare for some newness... I feel good. Our home feels good.