Bowing before the moon

Another doodle to comtemplate.

I thought about it in the shower and while driving to class.

What came up is the unpredictablness of life and how I deal with it. We expect certain things done in a certain way, other people's behaviours, just because it's been this way... and when something comes along to disturb the peace... well, here's where the challenge comes.

How present can I remain.

I tried not to react, but I did. I fell into victim mode,

"Why me, Why me, Why me... wwaaaaaaa, wwaaaa, wwwaaaa"

yeah, I could easily had a full blown out temper tantrum :-)

and then I remembered,

"don't shoot the messenger"

and I looked at it much more deeply.

I looked at my habitual behaviour. Stuff we repeatedly do from our past childhood.

Then, I looked at what was really happening behind all this. What was the REAL issue here and... Why is it pushing my button?

I began thinking about my habits, my rituals, my addictions... all those things that bring comfort to me, and the things that help to bring ease into my life.

Take astrology for instance.

Every day I read my personalized horoscope for the day right along with the general ones.. These include planetary aspects, rising signs, what house the moon is in...

It is ritual... and most likely an addiction andI wondered if I could be more intuitive without it.

This caught my attention:

It is from The Yoga Sutras of Patanjali. -Shraddha: Faith, trust. We need to trust in the intelligence of the Universe and welcome any experiences that come our way. It is about accepting and loving what is, rather than what we think should be.

This message spoke to my heart about the matter and I began to relax into seeing there might be other alternatives, other options, solutions to be had (instead of pouting).

It's been my ongoing intention to remain in the present moment and allow life to unfold, not always to my whim, not always how I think it should be, but delve into the unpredictableness of life and see what the Universe has in store for me. Sometimes I blow it.

I must say, I see growth. I bounce back more quickly, look at where the resistance is and cut through it easier... faster... but of course, some instances are more challenging than others, and I forget.

It's an interesting concept, bowing. It is a sign of respect - humbleness. And we bow from the gut. Maybe I need to bow, to honor my gut, follow my gut and see where that takes me.

Hopefully I won't bump into any walls :-)

Dancing on the Edge

Balancing act.

My Sunday doodle while relaxing with hubby. He coloring (took my markers) and me doodling and mandala-making. Although the "should-haves" danced around my head, I relaxed.

Doodling is the art of allowing.

It's later that I "see" what my subconscious wants to say to me.

The image is on the edge, but it's not very high, so if I fall off, I won't have a long way to go.

It's not a big risk.

I noticed a mitten (winter) on one side and a butterfly on the other (summer).

The extremes again. The duality of life.

As a body, water is at the level of the throat chakra. To me it's symbolizing my emotional expression, something I have been more comfortable with, but still need to conscious of. To express my feelings has been a challenge for me, but I am working with it.

The creative eye, the third eye, is peering through two mountains. Two obstacles.

One I know, the other I'm not sure about..

Snow behind me, falling into the water. Coldness melting into the open seas.

Ah. That is my cold, seperate-self, the one that can push other's away.. it is the self that gets caught up in ego stuff, the need to be right.

melt away... melt away...

I am not seperate, but part of the whole.

I am the ocean and the drop.

We all are.

And it is through love, that the realization happens.

We each carry our light and that light is to be shared with others.

It is the talents we have that are to be spread out into the world, the light of our true self, the light of the divine within us, each of us, that needs to be given away in order for it to be returned to us.

see, the doodle can tell us many important things :-)

Releasing seeds for new potentials

Finding the beauty in change.

The new moon fell in my 2nd house of values, and being in Libra, also beauty and balance.

And that is why I began this blog, as a reminder to regain, or come back into balance when I notice I am teetering on the edge.

I've notice the theme of extremes in my life over the last few months. It was visible in my life, and in my face to see clearly.

Always reminders.

Life constantly gives us messages in so many ways. In our relationships, or in nature. We just need to keep our minds open to it and our hearts as well.

Nature, and it's cycles of life and death, present us with an abundance of examples.

In the summer, I usually photograph these lotus in full bloom, but I can see the beauty in their releasing as well.

Releasing the seeds for new flowers, new blossoms that will capture our attention.

New moons are like planting seeds, new intentions for ourselves.

I choose to plant seeds of nurturing myself.

I read that if we can nurture ourselves 51 % of the time, we can easily nurture others 49 % of the time.

We must fill our own well, in order to give to others.

Find that fine line of balance between you and others. Libra rules relationships.

There is also a reminder from that lotus, that in order for the new to come, you must release, let go of that which needs to leave.

Make room for something new.

Let go.

There is a risk in letting go, a fear that what will come may not be to our liking.

We are comfortable with what we know, but in order to grow, we must learn to take risks, or the Universe just may do it for us.

So, I look to what needs to be released, what has lost it's value but I continue to hold on to anyway... just in case.

If I let them go, I can look at them as seeds. Releasing them to the wind, finding fertile ground in which new life will begin.

Where have I been?!?

My husband and I exhibited our art together, which is still up. Photos on the art blog :-)
This was one of the highlights of our year.
Very exciting! Great energy.
We've got so many more ideas cooking :-)
I have learned so much about my Self these past few months, and where I find myself in balance. My art, my spiritual path are highest priorities for me and sharing what I find. My husband and I walk together on this path moving towards a special place where we can share with others.
The most important lesson for me has been to connect with my heart center, keep the heart open, using the breath to stay centered and in the moment.
Some harder lessons of "space" and letting go, looking at a bigger picture, attachment.. these were the challenges and knocked me off my center.
But, I get back up. I try to do better and find compassion for my self. Yoga helps.
It is one of my activities that grounds me, humbles me, and keeps my heart open.
A blessing of community.
Have a most wonderful day... and be grateful :-)
Namaste'

Towards........

So much has come together for me in the last month or so. Not sure if it's the meditating along with the reading, the show.. my life back to where I want it to be as far as work is concerned. I'm guessing it is all of it. It's because it is what I want. Where I want it all to be.

Focusing on that, what I do want rather than what I don't.

duh.

Most of the summer, I was focused on just that.. what I DIDN'T want and that is exactly what I got.. more of what I didn't want.. It was the moving away from experience rather than the moving towards experience.

I want this.

Working with the assemblages has been such a blessing. They've all come together easily for the most part. Anything that didn't, I left to sit with awhile. It was when I pushed rather than went with the flow - that it didn't fall into place.

Sometimes I just walked away and worked on another piece until it some how clicked. Many times it was the rummaging throught stuff that the perfect piece was found and then the flow came back. Wonderful.

It's pretty much a lesson of life. Stop pushing, resisting, but rather focus on what it is you do want, focus on the end result or the feeling it would provoke instead.

and stop carrying other people's baggage!

Travel lightly.

If something is unclear, ask questions, even if it is to yourself.

Choosing to move towards that which brings me the greatest joy, the best feelings, towards that which feels full of love. Respond to the experience of each blessed moment.

Be in it.

Make Art and Have Fun.

Y

Power of the elements

If there is one thing I have learned, it is the importance of spending time in nature. The power that Nature brings to us... soothing quality of water (until there is too much of it)... clean, clear blue skies (until there is too much of it).. Nature teaches us the importance of balance.
We appreciate rain, when there is too little of it and the sun when there is too much.
Balance of the elements. Balance in our lives.
Appreciating when our lives are in balance, each time working harder to maintain it.
It is appreciated more so when we lose that balance and then find it again.
It is difficult to maintain.
We fall into drama, allow fears, worries and other's opinions, to control our decisions... fear of what? What or who are we listening to, allowing our judgement to be contaminated?
We all need to be media-free for awhile. Turn off the TV, the radio, your cell, computer, and whatever gadget you may be addicted to and spend some alone time, quiet time... just listening.
Listen to nature. Listen to your Self. Your wise, sacred and divine Self. Pass the chatter of ego, you will eventually hear Her or Him.
Please remind me of this.

Swan's message

Lessons from Life on the issue of balance... Swan speaks of commitment among other things.

I've noticed how I have commited to things this year that I was unable to complete. It's not something I relish. I like to honor my commitments... but I have been remiss in this area.

I have over committed.. AGAIN. Maybe I'm just naive, thinking I can do more than I am capable of.

My mother used to say my eyes were bigger than my stomach... and this has held true for more than my food appetite.. It is my wanting to participate in all those cool projects, interesting jobs and those things that challenge me to move outside the box.

yes.. yes.. yes.. one too many times. ok, more than ONE too many times.

I'm thinking we should have a mute button on us. I am just too quick on the words without thinking it through. Too impulsive.
I should practice, "I'll get back to you"....

Swan has such grace and I've lost it a few times this summer. MELTDOWN is being kind.

Swans mate for life, which is why they are thought to symbolize commitment... and if I had unlimited time to bring forward all that I've committed to, then I don't really have a problem.

Unfortunately, other's don't see it this way.

As far as the balance thing, over-committing means it leaves scant time for my own stuff... my "thinking process" time, my own art, mandalas, journaling, blogging, my upcoming show of assemblages and shrines... what-in-the-world-was-I-thinking?!?
The new moon eclipse brought up a buried old dream/solution. Starting a morning only Art & Yoga camp for preschoolers 4 days a week next summer. Saying goodbye to 25 years of camp art. There are attachments, but I know I need this for my sanity. It is time to let go.

For balance, I need a committment to myself.

Om :-)